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When I was 8 years old, my teacher handed us a report to fill up. "What Do I Want to Be When I Grow Up? List down your top 3 choices". Naively, I wrote:
(1) A nurse
(2) An FBI agent (CSI and Alias FTW!)
(3) A priest (I think I was meant to say a "pastor" lol)
Even though I am a daughter of a business man, the thought of me starting my own business never occurred to me. Maybe it did.. but I never entertained the thought too long because:
I didn't think I had anything "special" to offer.
What if I lose money and end up a bankrupt??
Hard work. Requires lots of hours. I would sacrifice my family life for my business.
I mean, let's be real. What do I know about starting a business??
Oh, those self-limiting thoughts masqueraded as "reality" were actually rooted from my fear of failure and the sickening feeling that I am and will never be good enough. After all, there was no reason to do it. I had a high paying job and was doing really well in an international bank. Living in the rat race of life.
Satisfy my bosses' expectations.
Lead my team well.
Manage work politics.
Earn lots of money.
Get promoted.
Repeat.
But deep down inside, I knew I was made for more. You know those career and personality quizzes that you take? I would get a "Counselor" EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I loved helping people, but I didn't want to be poor while helping people! But wouldn't I be more secured in a corporate job? But what do I know about doing this professionally? Too many "buts". However, the only BUT that required my focus was "BUT GOD"
I am afraid. BUT GOD gives me courage.
I am broke. BUT GOD is a good Dad. He will provide.
I don't know how to build a website. BUT GOD, the most creative Designer, will help me.
So here I am.. sharing this highly vulnerable journey with you. Full of hope of what God can do in me and through me. No more being my own worst critic. But being courageous and taking the plunge of being my own boss :)
How about you? Would like to know if you always wanted to do something but have not because of some "annoying" voices.